do you ever just rub your eyes so hard that you just start entering some other fucking galaxy of swirls and patterns
if someone ever cheats on me im going to invite them for a romantic candle lit dinner in a deserted area and then im going to tell them stories about how i killed my ex boyfriend in the woods because he cheated on me and then im going to point to the trees and say “actually those woods right over there” and then im going to blow out the candle and laugh
I wish I would have found this before my ex cheated on me.
omg im dying
guys im online shopping for dog collars and i just found a website where you can have stuff printed on the collars and theres one here that says ‘slut’ thats hillarious :’)
edit: this one says ‘bitch’ omfgggg
HOLY SHIT THOSE COLLARS ARNT FOR DOGS THERE FOR PEOPLE THIS IS A FETISH AND BONDAGE WEBSITE OH GOD
my life plan is to one day be walking down the street and run into my favourite band member and pretend i don’t know who they are and act like i don’t run a blog dedicated to their existence and start a normal conversation and then they will think “wow she’s pretty cool and she’s not a crazed fan i’m going to ask her out for dinner” and then 5 years after we’re married i’ll say
i knew you were in the band
i knew
I remember when I thought people in their 20’s were adults. Now all of my friends are in their 20’s and everybody is just kind of fumbling around bumping into each other, trying to figure out where the free food is……
so that’s pretty much what I’m expecting to experience for the next like 10 years.
